As I have said so many times before, all I ever wanted to be was a Mum.
For as long as I can remember I’ve always held this intense desire to have my own children and the fact that I had them young was not by accident, it was by choice. A real, conscious decision and the best one I ever made.
I had just turned 21 when I had Milla and I was 22 when I had Arlo; my two girls are literally the lights of my life and I wouldn’t change a single thing about them. They make me happy, they make me laugh, they keep me on my toes and they make me appreciate this incredible life and being their Mother every single day.
But as some of you know all too well, motherhood can be lonely.
I grew up in Bendigo and moved to the ‘big smoke’ at just 18 when Jake was drafted to play AFL. We had Milla less than four short years later and being so young, I was the first in my close friendship group to have kids. I only had a few friends here in Melbourne which back then (and sometimes even now) was a big, strange, overwhelming new town compared to Bendigo.
I also have a big, incredible, supportive family and as every girl knows, sometimes you just need your Mum. Unfortunately, that’s not always possible for me as we’re separated by two hours of travel and while I head home as much as I can, sometimes you just need someone right then and there. Someone who can actually speak in full sentences or about topics other than Peppa Pig and Paw Patrol.
Being the partner of an elite athlete is also a challenge as so much of their time is taken up by trainings, games, appearances and other commitments. I often felt like a single parent through no fault of Jake’s but purely because his career demanded so much of his time.
This is also the case with my very best friend Chloe, who also hails from Bendigo and lives literally across the street, when she was picked up by the Melbourne Vixens. Chloe is the most supportive best mate I could ask for, always helping out with the girls when she can and just being there for me, but I can’t always lean on her. Not only is she at the beginning of a stellar netball career, she is also completing a law degree. Overachievers, right?
Anyway, things got a little lonelier once Jake and I separated, and while I have been slowly finding my feet and rediscovering myself, it hasn’t been without lots of different kinds of help.
It’s quite serendipitous the way things work out and it really was by accident that I discovered Mush. It’s a FREE app and what can I say… It’s literally like Tinder for Mums.
It has allowed me to connect with other like-minded Mums whether that’s for a stroll and a coffee, a playdate, someone to do pilates with or simply a kid-free venting session. I can locate other Mums near me with similar interests and needs, and while sometimes it’s just a one-off, you can end up forming lifelong friendships as well as an additional support network when you feel like you have no one. It’s really quite amazing.
The most important reason I am sharing this with you is because, since deciding to bare all on social media I have had so many other women reach out to me and share similar stories of loneliness. For me, blogging started out as a form of therapy but it has evolved into so much more and if I can help others in a similar situation, well that would just be everything to me.
So, to all of the ladies who have been getting in touch – you need to download Mush! Find other women near you who are also lonely, single or struggling, or even those who aren’t and just want to make some new friends. You can never have enough gal pals.
Head to www.letsmush.com to check it out… I promise you won’t regret it.